Luke Grown Up

I don’t want to type out a whole story, because for the most part nothing ridiculous happened. I want to say two things: first, fuck the guys playing country all night at the bar. That was rude and unnecessary. When my Cake song played, I was overjoyed, and though Cake is awesome, I shouldn’t be so excited when a good song comes on that I ignore everyone else and start singing it.

Second, fuck you John, for buying me a Red Bull and vodka, the one thing I said I didn’t want. You know I can’t take vodka, and my inability to speak and walk pretty much immediately after drinking it should have been a clue.

Actually, one more thing: Fuck you Luke, for actually drinking that shit. Show some fucking restraint, cockface.

I’m supposed to be picked up by my parents at 1 for dinner. It’s 11 AM and I’m still drunk. RUH ROH.

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